The content of the article:
- Autohoroscope from 6 to 12 August
- Aries
- Taurus
- Twins
- Cancer
- a lion
- Virgo
- scales
- Scorpion
- Sagittarius
- Capricorn
- Aquarius
- Fishes
Wonderful roads, wonderful cars, happy drivers - why not ?! And if you add kind and caring traffic cops to this list, the ride will turn into a fairy tale. By the way, the stars conducted a poll and found out - only one percent of the drivers call the traffic guards DPS nicknames, and the rest call them in the old way. Although, traffic inspectors are not called, they come themselves. But enough of the lyrics, because you still need to remember about pedestrians - it's not about two-legged, but about four-legged fluffy creatures. Funny drunk cats in bright caps are scampering everywhere - well, of course, because they celebrate World Cat Day. So that's why we are haunted by the smell of valerian - even the cars smelled and began to purr and gently honk.
Autohoroscope from 6 to 12 August
Aries
Aries, do not condemn greedy traffic cops, do not criticize slow drivers and do not grumble at scattered pedestrians - in these August days you have enough trouble even without them. Either go to the sink, then roll to the beach, then look into the repair shop. By the way, when you drop into the shop for a bottle of cold water, do not forget to congratulate everyone on the holiday. The refrigerator was patented 119 years ago. Let's say thanks to the American inventor Albert Marshall - if not for him, they would suffer from the heat and endlessly dive into the cellars (or where they used to store ice there). And buy ice cream for tired and overgrown patrol guys - road sweets will be delighted and will not fine you.
Taurus
Taurus, under the sound of wheels, it is easier to think, and interesting thoughts come. So, stop - are you on the train, or are you by car ?! If by car, then where did the tapping come from - it's time to talk to the mechanic. Well, then you can go - this August week will be interesting and eventful. Just do not be surprised if you come across lisping traffic cops, and do not try to tease them - they will still be offended and will stop talking altogether. Moreover, they have temporary problems with speech - they celebrate the birthday of actor Stanislav Sadalsky and remember his role as Brick from the film: "The meeting place cannot be changed." “Mowing, mowing, what a mowing” - your car loves this moment.
Twins
Gemini, these August days are awaiting you with difficult tracks and strange companions. Well, everything is clear with the tracks, but inadequate passengers will have to be dealt with. They will fall into a trance, then they will start offering charged water and making passes with their hands - the guys celebrate the birthday of Anatoly Mikhailovich Kashpirovsky. Remember, in the nineties, everyone sat in front of TV screens and recovered in unison? The iron girlfriend does not lend itself to hypnosis, and does not advise you. And then you will take the psychotherapist's fans to fortune-tellers and psychics all week - do you need it? It is better to drop them off at the nearest traffic police post - let the traffic cops chatter and give them magic potions to drink.
Cancer
Crayfish, the brazen muzzles of police cars peep out of the bushes - and wink and beckon, promising a beautiful life and a smooth path. And where did they find green spaces, like they cut everything down a long time ago, maybe they brought some branches with them and disguised themselves? Forgive the stars for unnecessary information and start reading the horoscope for this August road week. And forget about potholes, pits and traffic jams - in some strange way, your car finds only ideal tracks (maybe it has its own navigator, which is called iron intuition?). If you meet cheerful guys in helmets, give them a ride - the builders are having a holiday today (suddenly they were building your garage, so there is a reason to note).
A lion
Lions, this road week is full of surprises and adventures. Look for a cheap gas station and hit the road. When you stand by the zebra, pay attention to the fit and cheerful grandmothers - do not worry, this is not an advertisement for a happy life in old age. It's just that pensioners celebrate the day of the athlete - jump out of the car and get on the gym. So that's why the tracks are so busy - cars also love all kinds of competitions. But do not arrange races - you are already the best car enthusiast, and medals for speed are still not given out. By the way, it became clear to the stars why all the traffic cops had their uniforms torn in these August days - the poor fellows went too far with squats and push-ups.
Virgo
Virgo, cars need to be renamed urgently - let it be SUVs. And that - there are no roads and is not expected, which means that the name is quite suitable. The stars will not burden you with sad reflections - the week is rich in all sorts of pleasantries (the driver of your sign will not get bored). The swimming season after Ilyin's day seems to have closed, but on the beach routes you can see tens of thousands of cars - join us, five hours on the road, ten hours in a traffic jam, and here you are by the river (swim, dry up - and go home). If you are stopped by traffic cops with big sad eyes, do not succumb to their charms - the patrolmen celebrate the day on which the cartoon about the deer Bambi was released (you watched it in the garage along with the wheelbarrow).
Scales
Scales, jumping and bouncing on the asphalt, kicking the front end - these days, not only the front of the car is sad, but everything else is also in sadness. It is understandable, because there are much more speed bumps than real ones (at least you can negotiate with the living) - look, they lay down at every kilometer, you can't get through, you can't get through. But if you are tired of road delights, go to the village - the tracks there are not ideal, but everything is fair. Bumps mean bumps, pits means pits. And be attentive on August Friday - guys in chocolate suits are running along the roads and treating them to free melted goodies. Everyone celebrates the birthday of Henry Nestlé - he is the first milk chocolate maker.
Scorpion
Scorpions, and you sit in a convertible and rush off somewhere - imagine how great it is. Sit in a leather cabin, sip on expensive wine and look indulgently out the window at poor pedestrians and drivers who are stunned by the heat. Well, now the stars will count to three, clap their hands and make you wake up - the traffic jam is drawing to a close, and you haven’t called your friends yet and told you that you will be coming soon. Meet somewhere on the field, dig the first potatoes and celebrate Anna Letnyaya. A tasty snack and drinks are relied on - put up a tent and spend the night in nature (the iron horse of mosquitoes and gadflies is not afraid and will not grumble and kick).
Sagittarius
Sagittarius, probably, your iron horse has a lucky number - otherwise how can you explain road luck? Or maybe you are carrying a good number with you - this summer week the driver of your sign is dashing around kilometer-long traffic jams, they easily negotiate with strict traffic cops and do not even quarrel with harmful two-legged creatures. But the situation with the old women-summer residents is not so simple - the grandmothers decided that you are obliged to give them a lift. And how can you get past beautiful cucumbers, strong zucchini and adorable tomatoes? Just do not turn on the radio in the salon, otherwise the grandmothers will tighten the Khutoryanka or Lavanda in chorus. Sofia Rotaru has a birthday in August, and her songs are heard from all receivers.
Capricorn
Capricorns, ride a bike - your legs will be stronger, rush on the Niva - conquer the mountains, but go on foot - you will find adventure. The stars do not know anything about public transport, although in trams and buses everything is as usual - angry conductors, brooding passengers and careless drivers.If you decide to go on a trip in a car, get ready to meet the guys from the traffic police - surprise the traffic cops and read them “I met you”. Maybe you will get the applause, at the same time mark the day on which Fyodor Tyutchev wrote this poem - almost an anniversary, for 148 years. But do not load your favorite typewriter in the August period with verses - from love poetry it sneezes and strives to stall.
Aquarius
Aquarians, your car is very sensitive - when you are angry, it slows down, when you are happy, the car picks up speed. So watch your mood - the more calm you are, the smoother the road. Although no rules work on our routes - even if all drivers go on strike and start walking, traffic jams will still not go anywhere. And do not try to take a shortcut - well, you will save a spoonful of gasoline, but you will waste a bunch of nerve cells. As you drive past multi-storey buildings, pay attention to the cheerful guys swinging on the ropes - they celebrate the day of the climber. So that's why the iron horse pulls into the mountains - it turns out that she loves this holiday and dreams of conquering heights.
Fishes
Fish, was there a traffic cop, maybe there was no traffic cop? All drivers are asking this question in the August period - the guys from the ghost patrol rush along the roads. It will appear, then disappear - mysticism, and nothing more. Never mind, people are just overheated, so the devil knows who seems to be. But pedestrians are quite real - Müller is wandering along the zebra, Bormann is running along the sidewalk, and a brooding Stirlitz is standing at the traffic light. The people have a holiday, because 45 years ago they started showing the film "Seventeen Moments of Spring". That was a TV series so a series, not like the current soap operas! The patrol guys also note - how they are encrypted and disguised, one might think, no one guessed what they wanted.
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